It is so true that important dates are definitely harder to celebrate when you are missing that one special person who you have always celebrated it with. For the past 26 years, I have celebrated New Year's Eve with Greg. This was the first one without him in it since I was 21 years old. My heart is definitely hurting. However, Greg left me with the most precious gift, (other than 3 children) and he probably didn't even know it. In 2013, he started writing a prayer journal, and that has been so encouraging and inspirational to me. It has helped me feel closer to him and miss him more all at the same time. If you want to do something special for those you love, start writing in a journal. It will be a precious gift for those you love when you are no longer here to share your thoughts with them.
This was the 2nd time we met on December 31,1991 and we decided to date!
I have been reading books on grieving and the different aspects of grief. I fit them all. I am
'up' most days, and cry when I see IU socks in a store or hear a song on the radio. I am forgetful and my mind is filled with a million different things that I have to do. I almost get lost in my own world most days. But, I am still full of joy and that is an answer to prayer. Truthfully one of my biggest worries was that I would stop being happy and lose my joy. Thankfully that has not happened, I am still full of joy and I am for the most part, very happy.
Greg called Annie his sunshine, or sunny. His favorite hymn was, "It Is Well With My Soul."
These pictures may not mean much to you. However, when you are trying to get in the Christmas spirit and you just can't get there... then you see these items in the store, you know God cares about you and it isn't a coincidence that those two signs are together. Or that in an entire store filled with Carolina items that there are IU socks placed nicely in the middle of them. FYI... they don't sell IU gear in NC!
I think I can describe myself like Bethany Hamilton. She is the girl that the movie, Soul Surfer was based on. If you have never seen this movie, it is a true story about a teen surfer who loses her arm in a shark attack. She has to learn how to live, surf, do all the things she once knew how to do with ease, with only one arm. If you have ever talked to someone who has lost a limb, they often say it still feels like the limb is still there, but it's not. THAT is how I feel. I have to learn how to do everything over. Because in my life with Greg, there was always someone to give me advice, balance me out, make me laugh, pay the bills, and 1000 other things. Now, I have to figure out how to live without him. However, even though he is gone, I still feel like he is here. I feel him saying, "Now Miss" or "You're doing a good job" or " I love you!" I know he is all around me and because of that, I can still smile, and laugh and truly be filled with joy. Even when the pain of losing my right arm is extremely painful.
I need to get to all the blessings from 2017... I am going to list them as I can remember them and then post some pictures to take us all on a memory lane field trip because those are always fun!
January- Greg was blessed with his job at Arlington Baptist as Missions Director. (I feel like this gave him another year of life. I will forever be grateful to them for blessing our family with this job!)
Greg turned 48 years old, it was a great day, and he enjoyed his favorite cake!
March~ Had a great trip to the beach where we made lots of very COLD and great memories!
May~ Alex graduated!
And Greg and Alex played golf!
Aug~ Greg, Annie and I went on a mission trip to Pittsburgh! Alex and Jerod both went to Liberty for what would be Alex's first year and Jerod's last. We celebrated Jerod's 21st birthday!
Sept~ We received some not so great news. We decided to eat a lot and have as much fun as possible. So, we did!
Oct~ Celebrated my birthday! Went to the beach with Greg's family and had an amazing vacation! Had a great time handing out Halloween candy.
Nov~ Went to LU to see the boys. Had an amazing ceremony for Annie.
Enjoyed Thanksgiving together! Celebrated Annie turning 14!
Dec~ Enjoyed time with family! Laughed a lot! Celebrated Christmas! Cried a lot! Ate even more, and now it is time to get movin! We are ready to share Christ in 2018, get fit in 2018, get healthy, (physically and emotionally) and learn a lot, next year at this time, I do hope I can say we have done well!
Annie likes to visit her Daddy when she is missing him.
Had some fun at an Escape Room!
Spent some time with my parents for Christmas.
Happy 2018!
Thank you for following us on this journey and praying us through it!
Missy, Jerod, Alex and Annie
